When I was in primary school (class 2 and 3), there used to be this classmate of ours, while the average age was 8 years he was14. The story was that, he was brought from the village to the city for a better education. His name was TONDO !!! At the sight of Tondo many of us would run and hide our lunch boxes because the big bully who was obviously stronger than us would want to share our meals with us.
Whatever Tondo could not ask for, he took by force, in fact asking was only done when an older and stronger person was present. I and Isaac (the most quiet boy in the class) were always his targets. The reason was simple, we never understood the rationale of showing our food to some big fool before eating it. We were therefore traitors according to Tondo's dictionary. Whenever we were to go to school, I would become sad and gloomy. Immediately it was break time, sometimes we would run and hide in the toilet then eat lunch there; Tondo soon discovered that tactic and we had to change. We then decided to be eating in front of the Principal's office, we succeeded for 3 days before we were told by the Security not to eat there. All this while our performances at school were deteriorating at an alarming rate but our parents probably thought it was too much play and television.
Isaac the quiet boy was the one that put an end to Tondo's bullying on the 5th June,1990, during break time. I and Isaac had gone to the back of our classroom to eat, I complained that Tondo will see us easily if he comes out, Isaac told me to calm down that he was going to teach Tondo a lesson he will never forget. As fate would have it, Tondo saw us and came to collect his share as usual. He stretched his hand to collect Isaac’s lunch box. With the agility of a rattle snake, I saw Isaac jump and blow Tondo on the nose, Tondo shouted in pain, Isaac then took to his heels leaving me in shock. I was surprised to see blood coming out from his nose. O my God! It was then that I saw the bottom of a nail protruding from where blood was rushing out from. I ran and called our class Teacher and Tondo was rushed to the hospital. Isaac was questioned and everybody who knew him was surprised at the answer he gave: “Tondo has a very big eye and always collects our food to eat, I wanted to blind one of his eyes”. Isaac was suspended from School for 2 weeks, Tondo came back 3 days later with a swollen nose that had a big plaster on it and the Principal gave him a stern warning to behave himself or be expelled. So the bullying stopped. Isaac later told me he spent 4 days sharpening the point of that nail!
Friends, I have been there and I assure you it was not a good experience at all. It will forever remain etched in my memory. Those days are scars that have refused to heal. I have already made up my mind, NO BAGGER DARE BULLY my child or ELSE…
You can help your child by: First, give your child space to talk, Consider seeing the teacher (at school) or parent of the bully if at home. You may change schools if the school authorities do not intervene.
POSSIBLE SIGNS OF BULLYING
1. Check for bruises on the body. When a child is held/strangled by the collar of his uniform, there tends to be marks there.
2. Investigate unexplained wounds.
3. Check for torn uniforms, books, stolen pencils etc
4. Ask him/her whether he likes his present school or would prefer another.
5. Ask his friends whether he/she is happy at school.
6. The most important of them all: if your child's academic performance begin to fall, wahala dey ! No child no matter how brilliant will perform well in the face of constant bullying.
7. Feel ill in the mornings.
8. Become withdrawn, start stammering, lack confidence.
9. Attempt or threaten suicide
10. Cry themselves to sleep, have nightmares
11. Have their possessions go missing
12. Ask for money or start stealing (to pay the bully)
13. Continually 'lose' their pocket money
14. Refuse to talk about what's wrong
15. Have unexplained bruises, cuts, scratches
16. Begin to bully other children, siblings
17. Become aggressive and unreasonable
18. Give improbable excuses for any of the above.
Friday
THE BULLY
When I was in primary school (class 2 and 3), there used to be this classmate of ours, while the average age was 8 years he was14. The story was that, he was brought from the village to the city for a better education. His name was TONDO !!! At the sight of Tondo many of us would run and hide our lunch boxes because the big bully who was obviously stronger than us would want to share our meals with us.
Whatever Tondo could not ask for, he took by force, in fact asking was only done when an older and stronger person was present. I and Isaac (the most quiet boy in the class) were always his targets. The reason was simple, we never understood the rationale of showing our food to some big fool before eating it. We were therefore traitors according to Tondo's dictionary. Whenever we were to go to school, I would become sad and gloomy. Immediately it was break time, sometimes we would run and hide in the toilet then eat lunch there; Tondo soon discovered that tactic and we had to change. We then decided to be eating in front of the Principal's office, we succeeded for 3 days before we were told by the Security not to eat there. All this while our performances at school were deteriorating at an alarming rate but our parents probably thought it was too much play and television.
Isaac the quiet boy was the one that put an end to Tondo's bullying on the 5th June,1990, during break time. I and Isaac had gone to the back of our classroom to eat, I complained that Tondo will see us easily if he comes out, Isaac told me to calm down that he was going to teach Tondo a lesson he will never forget. As fate would have it, Tondo saw us and came to collect his share as usual. He stretched his hand to collect Isaac’s lunch box. With the agility of a rattle snake, I saw Isaac jump and blow Tondo on the nose, Tondo shouted in pain, Isaac then took to his heels leaving me in shock. I was surprised to see blood coming out from his nose. O my God! It was then that I saw the bottom of a nail protruding from where blood was rushing out from. I ran and called our class Teacher and Tondo was rushed to the hospital. Isaac was questioned and everybody who knew him was surprised at the answer he gave: “Tondo has a very big eye and always collects our food to eat, I wanted to blind one of his eyes”. Isaac was suspended from School for 2 weeks, Tondo came back 3 days later with a swollen nose that had a big plaster on it and the Principal gave him a stern warning to behave himself or be expelled. So the bullying stopped. Isaac later told me he spent 4 days sharpening the point of that nail!
Friends, I have been there and I assure you it was not a good experience at all. It will forever remain etched in my memory. Those days are scars that have refused to heal. I have already made up my mind, NO BAGGER DARE BULLY my child or ELSE…
You can help your child by: First, give your child space to talk, Consider seeing the teacher (at school) or parent of the bully if at home. You may change schools if the school authorities do not intervene.
POSSIBLE SIGNS OF BULLYING
1. Check for bruises on the body. When a child is held/strangled by the collar of his uniform, there tends to be marks there.
2. Investigate unexplained wounds.
3. Check for torn uniforms, books, stolen pencils etc
4. Ask him/her whether he likes his present school or would prefer another.
5. Ask his friends whether he/she is happy at school.
6. The most important of them all: if your child's academic performance begin to fall, wahala dey ! No child no matter how brilliant will perform well in the face of constant bullying.
7. Feel ill in the mornings.
8. Become withdrawn, start stammering, lack confidence.
9. Attempt or threaten suicide
10. Cry themselves to sleep, have nightmares
11. Have their possessions go missing
12. Ask for money or start stealing (to pay the bully)
13. Continually 'lose' their pocket money
14. Refuse to talk about what's wrong
15. Have unexplained bruises, cuts, scratches
16. Begin to bully other children, siblings
17. Become aggressive and unreasonable
18. Give improbable excuses for any of the above.
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